Don't Help Me {Sousuke}

Don't Help Me

The sliding doors couldn’t open fast enough for the young man as his rapid pace lead him out the front of the hospital. Close in toe were two women and an older male that tried to keep up with him as his stormed towards the parking lot. His mind obviously wasn’t with him because he nearly stepped out into heavy traffic before getting grabbed by the arm and pulled back.
“Kyno, wait!” The man roared as he drug his son back and the horn blared past as the driver gave a disgruntled hand gesture.
“Let go! I’m done! I’m not doing this anymore!” He shouted ripping his arm back away from his father.
“They are just trying to help Kyno” His mothers softer tone pleaded, her eyes ready to erupt in tears.
“No they can’t! No one can!” He snapped and regretted the sharp tone, as it seemed it alone was enough to through his mother into a full weep. They'’ taken him to more doctors than he could count, and he'’ been poked prodded, tested and examined more than enough, each time their conclusion was the same, the was just nothing they could do for him. As his family began to fall apart before his eyes he arched his head back to avoid letting his own tears fall. Kyno took a deep breath before continuing in a calmer tone. “Is this what you want? Why can’t you just stop…” He begged.
“But, you’ll die if we-” his father started but was cut short by Kyno who’d already planned through this conversation a thousand times in his head.
“Die!? Everyone dies, I’m no different but…why can’t you at lest let me enjoy what life I have left? If this is how the rest of my life is going to be I’d rather be dead already” He retorted and for a moment his words seemed to sink in.
“Kyno..” His mother said softly but he’d clearly had enough began walking down the street at the same accelerated speed walk he always carried when upset.
“Kyno! Where are you going!?” His father’s voice yelled over the sound of cars as they drove past.
“I’ll walk home!” He answered without turning. He knew what they say, what if you black out again, what if this what if that, at this point he welcomed it all of it, at lest it would be an end to this shit. He really couldn’t stand it, the crying, the worrying, and the pain he put his entire family through every day. But he was far too stubborn to just take his life, he hadn’t given up, not entirely, but he had given up on the doctors.

Wc: 448

"I'm going to get smokes!" I snarl and storm out of the studio. The she witch had snuck in and proceeded to drape herself on me. And there was no amount of cigarettes in the world to allow me to handle her for an extend period of time. I sigh as I step out on the sidewalk and breath for a moment. My senses are highly sensitive and her perfume nearly choked me. She does it on purpose. But i have to say. I have gotten better with my abilities. I can 'see' in a sense. There are no colors. People don't have faces. More like an outline of everything with no real detail. But it was far better than the darkness I had known when I was younger.

I place my hands into my pockets as I begin to walk for the drug store. I really was out of cigarettes. Tohma wishes I would stop smoking. But my voice is fine. My healing abilities are pretty good for a human. But I know I'm more than that. Something whispers to me. I dodge a child as he runs by, the mother apologizing. I don't say anything to her and continue on. I didn't need her to look into my eyes and realize I'm blind. I hate when I get pity for it. So what. I'm blind. I deal with it and move on with my life.

Dammit I could use a cigarette right now. I'm a bit aggitated from K coming in without warning. I really need to keep my senses on alert for her spiritual signature. I shake my head and brush back my hair. I forgot to tie it back. No matter I suppose. But then I hear shouting as I round the corner. Its faint. Bit far off. But I have really good hearing. I can see the aura of the one moving quickly my way and I can somehow sense he is upset. His aura speaks of a male. I let it go but then I am forced to move in and get in front of him, blocking him from running down a little child.

"Even if you're angry. Watch where you are walking or someone will get hurt," I say to him softly, not looking at him but to the side, not needing him to see my blind orbs.

-395

Don't Help Me

Kyno wasn’t entirely sure what he hoped to accomplish by walking back to the lower commons, in all respects it seemed a bit on the dumber side of the coin. It was more of he just needed to get away from the hospital and his family, if he never saw another hospital in his life he’d be just fine with that. He’d kept his apartment as his only sanctuary from his parent’s and sister, they weren’t all that bad, but really he felt if left under the same roof they’d drive him insane with their constant nagging and watching over him. He wasn’t made of glass, and he didn’t need protecting, as they seemed to think.

He was so caught up in his resentment that he didn’t even notice the child or the man until he stopped dead in tracks. He looked up just long enough to see the long hair and slender frame of the man before he cast his eye down to the sidewalk. Great he thought now who’s the ass? “S-sorry” He uttered the apology, which he seemed to be doing a lot lately. Then looked to the man again “Wait, how’d you know I was angry?” was he really that easy to read that even a random stranger could pick apart his every emotion. There was the chance that the man had heard the fight but Kyno wasn’t sure how, he’d barely been able to make out half the fight with the nose of the trucks and cars and he’d been in it, there was no way someone could hear that well.

Wc: 714

An apology. He seems to be regaining himself instead of walking in an almost blind rage. But then I find out he is smarter than he would seem as I get that question. I nearly curse. People found it odd when I knew how they were feeling when I could 'see' them. But people give off these aura I can sense in a way. Bah. I've never truly been able to understand it myself. Oh fuck it. I turn my head and look at where I sense him. At least I know I'm looking at his head. I wonder as I train this 'sight' of mine if things will gain more detail. I do not care about colors. I just want to be able to have a greater detail in the shadow realm my mind now envisions.

"I just was able to sense it. You were the only body moving away from yelling I could faintly pick up on. Also your aura is vibrating with distress," I tell him in an almost bored tone, wondering what sort of reaction I will get when he realizes my eyes are useless. Everybody has there own way of reacting to me. But from many its a form of pity. Makes me want to gag. Really. People needed to not think someone with a disability needed sorrow or pity. We learn how to make do. Hell.. Some of us do better than those people feeling pity. I know I do.

-641

Don't Help Me

What the man said sounded an awful like what that old crazy man had told him. “You can do that too, huh?” his question was mix of confusion and disbelief but at lest he knew he wasn’t loosing his hearing along with his mind. The way this guy looked at him, was the same way that old man had stared at him, but not really at him, more through him. Wait a seconded, Kynos scarlet eyes narrowed as he looked closer, he wasn’t looking at him at all, he was blind! The crimson orbs widened and he waved a hand in front of the lifeless gaze to see if he was correct in his analysis. If it was true then that old man had been blind to, witch made so much more sense, but still puzzled the young man. “You’re…I mean you can’t…” He stumbled over his words then realized there were still people around and lowered his tone “How the hell can you do that?” He asked, utterly fascinated at how he'd stopped him without the ability to see him. But he chalked it up to being able to hear his foots steps, still the amount of skill it took to calculate his speed, and distance to keep him from running over the kid that he’d missed was remarkable. But now he was looking at him almost dead on and that was something he could explain, because besides his voice he’d have nothing else to use to pinpoint his position that eassily.

Wc: 967

I can feel as I blink and his question makes me frown. I can do what exactly? But I'm waiting for him to notice the fact I can't really 'see' him. My eyes a pale violet or so my younger brother tells me. I remember they use to be a bit more blue in color. Not that I can remember the colors exactly anyway. He goes a bit silent and I sense his hand moving in front of my face, though I do see the glow of it slightly. I nearly flinch back in reflex. Its odd for me to be able to see what I can these days. I try to explain it to people and they get confused. But my brother just thinks its cool. Says it a big improvement from when we were kids.

"I'm blind. Yes," I say as he stutters in a stupid manner. He lowers his voice and another question comes. I find myself chuckling at his confusion. "I trained my spiritual senses," is all I answer for that and shrug. "It took me a long time. But I.. I can see your spiritual force. If that makes sense. Its like your just a glowing body of energy. I don't see details.. But I have other senses developed to aide me further," I explain. I don't know why I do. But I offer him this information. I feel myself faintly frowning. Not like me.

"So be careful. If you'll excuse me," I say softly and go to move past him and have to avoid a girl. She stops and looks at me, only to squeal.

"Oh my god! You're Sousuke of Eternal Eclipse!" Oh sweet kami save me.. A fangirl. I want to run. I don't deal with them all too well.

"Please keep your voice down," I say to her and she is bouncing in front of me and I sigh. This is not going to end well.

"Will you sign something?" she asks and I nod, wishing to escape her. I hear her pull something out and I see her arms being held out. But what she has doesn't have spiritual energy. I don't want to touch her and it makes me hesitate. I lift my hands and hold them out for what she wishes to give me.

-1027

Don't Help Me

As the man explains his ability in detail, Kyno can do little more than stare in awe. So it was true, that old man hadn’t been as crazy as he’d thought. He still had more questions than answers about how someone trained such an ability, but he kept his questions to him self. After all he didn’t know this man too well, and as he moved past him Kyno began to do the same. He’d just turned when he heard the high pitched squeal and glanced back to see a girl who was overjoyed to see the stranger. She addressed him as Sousuke, and it stirred a faint memory of his sister who was more up on the current music trends than he was. She’d something about the band once or twice but Keno couldn’t really remember anything beyond that thanks to his lack of interest in such things.

The young mans gaze hung on Sousuke as he dealt with his adoring fan. He was handsome, and Kyno could see why his sister and apparently other girls liked him. He wanted to as him more about his knowledge on the spirits and such things but something held him back. He’d probably already been enough of a bother, and he seemed busy with the girl, no doubt he got that a lot. Kyno shook his head and shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans as he forced himself to continue down the sidewalk.


Wc: 1,211

She eases the items into my hands. I feel the marker and I also feel a cd case in my hand. I bring the marker to it and sign what I always do. I then hold it out to her and she squeals in happiness, hurting my ears. She then begins to babble about how great I am and such and I sense that creepy rapist vibe from her. Aww crap. Another psycho fangirl to run from. I have to think quickly. Think Sousuke. Come on. Someone is moving away and I realize it the guy I stopped from crushing that kid. Idea!

"Umm.. I'm sorry. But I was with my friend.. I have to go," I say quickly and turn on my heel and quickly walk after the man and catch up. I slip my arm into his. "Just keep walking.." I hiss. "She's one of those psycho bitches that would love to rape me in an alley," I say to him softly as she tries to follow us. "I'm sorry. But can you act like we are friends heading out somewhere?" I ask him gently. "I'll pay you. Just.. I don't feel like fighting off a crazed woman at the moment." I can feel her trying to keep up and I stiffen quite a bit. She is going to be one of those persistant ones. Fuckin' hell.

-1256

Don't Help Me

The young man jumped in surprise when Sousuke’s arms inter locked with his. “What the-” He uttered just in time to be cut off by the other male telling him to play the role of his friend. Surprise etched into Kyno’s features along with a blush of embarrassment, his eyes flicking back to the girl who looked like some sort of lust crazed zombie. So that’s what fan girls were really like, he’d always thought adoring fans would be a good thing, but then again he’d never had any. Quickly he brought his gaze font and center, trying to act casual with was hard to do when you considered the situation. “How bout trying to loose her in there?” Kyno offered pointing to a bookstore. There was no way to stop her from following but at lest the shelves would be high enough to get lost in. How persistent could girl be really?

Wc: 1,364

He's playing along. Well thank Kami. I thought he would brush me off and make me fend her off alone. I'm really not in the mood to run all the way back to the studio when Kagura is there. Tohma is being a dick again and not warning me. That woman must have a way of masking herself. Because I never am able to sense her before she just fucking appears and tackles me with a hug and those huge breasts of her. I swear she has to have killed a man in those.

I hear him make a suggestion and I turn my head in the direction I see the aura arm pointing. I sense within and I know the plae because I know the owner well. I use to shop here alot when I dated Shiori. I push her out of my thoughts. These days she and I just bicker like siblings. "Good idea. Lead the way. I can see aura. But buildings don't have auras," I say to him. "And I really hate crashing into doors.." I add a very faint smile touching my lips. While I do know the layout of the place, its getting in that I sometimes require my walking stick. Which I left behind today because of K. Damn that woman.

-1474

Don't Help Me

As he speaks, I realize that my pointing was about as unnecessary as shouting at a deaf person. I was amazed when he seemed to know what I was talking about, He really didn’t act blind, but then again I didn’t act like I was dying either. At the smile I felt more nervous than comforted and agreed, I’d hate to run into doors to. At lest that was as embracing as forgetting where you were, or what year it was. I pulled the door open and entered “On your right” I murmured, holding the door for him until he touched the handle and could manage from there on his own. Once he was in I peered out the door to see if the girl had given up. “Does that happen often?” I asked.

Wc: 1,498

I see the shimmer that is his arm drop. He must have realized he was pointing. But I want to explain to him that I can see him in a sense. More as a silverish blue humanoid blob shape. Christ.. That sounds stupid even to me. But I don't know how else to describe it. And I know the color blue. I remember it. But lately its going more black and white as I train thise sense of mine. I let him lead the way, keeping my steps with his. We stop and I guess that we are at the door. I reach out my hand in reflex and I'm surprised by how gentle he is with placing the handle into my hand as he murmurs to me. I enter the store and he follows. I can sense the girl. I reach out to tug him along if he will allow to move use behind a shelf.

I shrug at the question then nod. "Only more recently with the release of our single. Its mostly younger girls right now. My younger brother sells the cds at the university and I know a couple of people who buy them and then give them to people they know will listen. Mostly we are word of mouth right now," I say to him. "But I've gotten stalkers since college. My brother says that even though I'm an asshole.. Girls love it.. I swear I don't get them. Maybe I should stick to dating men like my brother does." I grumble the last part and rub my temple.

-1738

Don't Help Me

Seeing the girl and feeling the tug almost at the same instance I go along with the guided direction of Sousuke’s hand and none to soon, because then I hear the ring of bell as the shop door opens. I give a sight before looking back to Sousuke and chuckling softly as his comment. “Word of mouth travels fast neh?” I commented “My younger sister will be really jealous that I meat you” I added. In fact she’d probably just be worried sick, ever since I’d been ill we never did have fun anymore. All our conversations just lead back to the same tired conversations that left us both depressed so lately we’d been avoiding talking to each other at all.

While thinking about how telling her of my adventure today and my hopes that it would lighten her mood I hear something that draws my gaze back to Sousuke with a fair amount of surprise evident in my face. “What?” is the only thing I could manage in reply? Of course I knew I wasn’t the only none hetero male on the planet but it often felt like I was. After the first few reactions I received when mentioning I found another male attractive I’d never repeated the statements again. In fact I kept all such thoughts to my self for the most part, because that’s how people preferred it. They may not all be outwardly upset by the idea, it just seemed more of that they rather to just pretend that everyone was ‘normal’ and not have to entertain the notion that some people weren’t straight. Still I was both shocked and ecstatic to hear that the other at lest didn’t seem to mind openly discussing the topic.

A small smirk crossed over my features after getting over the initial shock “Well if you were ever serious about that comment I might have to take you up on that offer.” I said in a deceptively joking manner, though my eyes would say there was no joke intended. I glanced back to see if the girl had given up and moved on. In truth I wasn’t sure what had prompted me to make such a bold statement. I was just tired of always playing it safe, and curious to see what his reaction would be.

Wc: 1,884

I didn't think my last utterance meant much. I'm pansexual. Gender doesn't specifically matter to me since I can't use visual stimulus to know what I do like. Physically though, my body enjoys both. So I labeled myself as gender blind or in terms, Pansexual. I know quite a few gay men along with bisexual. So its nothing big for me. But I can hear the surprise from him as he says 'What?'. The shifting of his body and that note in his voice. They tell me that he has not met any others who share in that taste. I nearly chuckle. So the boy is a closet gay, but knows he is but doesn't outwardly speak of it because it is a subject many would claim as taboo. Also with how my younger brother is... Well he isn't afraid to tell people he likes men. But then he does know how to take care of himself.

I give him a moment to collect himself and I fan out my senses for the girl. Well at least we lost her. I do hate having to be too cruel to them. Can hurt chances for the band if I make a scandla this early in our career. This is such a tender stage. This is something I want. I want to share my music because its the only time I will allow others see that deep into my soul. He speaks again and I find myself chuckling at the suddeness of it. I bring my hand ot my lips as I try to stifle the sound. I turn my head toward him. I wish I could see what he looks like. But I lift my hands and if did not move away I would cup his face and let my fingers trace his features.

"Not bad... How about as a treat you can come back to the studio and listen to us record for the next single?" I offer. "For helping me.. And for failing at trying to hit on me. Though I did find it a bit amusing... But it was sincere enough that I might let you take me out on a date."

-2102

Don't Help Me

As he reached out for my face I just blinked a few times in confusion. I guess I really never had the quickest reaction time, but I also didn’t have any reason to fear other people. Besides the emotional pains and stress that they inflicted I’d never been physically attacked or harmed by another person and so had no natural instinct to shy away from them. When his fingers began to trace over my face, I realized what he was doing. I’d seen it on a TV show once with a blind grandmother who could read peoples features much like Braille. I’d never thought that people actually did it, but I guess it made sense, it also meant that his spirit sight was limited more than I’d originally thought.

“Wow, really?” I responded with a soft tone, careful to keep my voice down as a curtsey to those men and women trying to read. I really did love music, and the chance too go see Sousuke’s band record live was just to perfect to pass up. I played the guitar, though it was more of a hobby than anything else, and after loosing my job and most of my independence music had always helped me pass the time I spent alone.

As for attempt being failed, I’d never expected it actually work, but what did I have to loose besides the approval of a man I’d just met? “Hey you never know unless you try, right?” I replied in the same cheerful but soft tone, before noticing the girl hadn’t found us and was no longer in sight.

Wc: 2,152

I nod slightly. I don't mind him listening to us record. And my band mates like the attention. Hopefully K is gone by then. But I can't let that woman distrat me from my work. Because then she just adds more to it. She's a sadist. I feel bad for that nephew of hers, Toushiro. I smirk a little at his next words and nod in agreement. "That is true. Though I don't know how a blind man could be of interest. I'm extrememly difficult to deal with. or so... Well everyone says actually," I shrug and make sure the girl is gone, fanning out my senses to insure we are safe.

"Damn. I still wanted to get smokes," I mutter then shrug. "I think I have some by the piano," I say, more to myself than to him. I hold out a hand to him, wanting him to take it. "Lead me out. The studio is on 12th and Main," I say to him. "Can't miss it. I'm signed to NG Productions," I add.

-2277

Don't Help Me

“I’m sure you’re not that bad” I responded, as I started making out way to the door. There were far more hassling things I’d dealt with, mostly my self. The constant forgetfulness, the random black outs and those weren’t even the worst of ticks. I suppose if I had grown up this way I’d have learned to live with it better, but this had all happened within the last few years, and I was really fed up with it. What was worse was the not knowing, at lest Sousuke’s hindrance was set in stone and never changed. I was never sure what would happen, why I forgot certain things and not others, what triggered my blackouts or hallucinations, it was all-random and seemed to happen at the worst possible times.

But would I tell him that? No. Sure, my reaction was to counter with “Hey at lest your not as bad as me” but then I’d have to explain my faults. I didn’t want to do that, I’m sure Sousuke didn’t care for his much either, but his was harder to hide. Maybe that made him stronger, or braver than I was, but I was fine with admitting I was weak just to be treated like any other normal person. For the the first time in what seemed like forever I was able to help someone else without him or her worrying about me. I was the normal one to him, and I liked it, I needed it. I’d do anything to keep that feeling.

There was however that little nagging voice at the back of my mind that said, “You shouldn’t lie, what if you slip up” But I quickly ignored it. I just had to keep my insanity hidden for a few hours. I’d get Sousuke back to his recording, hang out a bit and then head home, there was no harm in that, I could manage an hour or two. He’d never be the wiser, and I’d get to escape what my life had spiraled pathetically into.

We made it just out side the studio without much incident. I helped when it was needed, but it was still so strange, He always looked right at me or anyone else when they approached or spoke and yet couldn’t see the stop lights or signs. I had to keep reminding myself of that, pointing at things was useless for the most part and I caught myself at lest twice more before I caught on. “Here” I announced once we were out side the studio.

Wc: 2,576

I want to respond to his words. But I leave it. I know I'm a difficult man to handle. The only relationship that lasted more than a month was the one I had with Shiori. She and I knew how to handle one another's attitudes. She is still a fierce woman. I would never want to become her enemy. I pity the man who ever incurs her wrath because they are in for a living hell and death probably won't even let them seek peace from her. She and I brke up simply because we just.. Didn't view one another as a couple after a year. Even the sex lost a bit of spark. It evolved into us becoming more like brother and sister with the way we would squabble. Shuuhei use to enjoy it. Said it was funny how she nd I would argue. But then.. Arguements between intellectual people always tend to have a bit more meat to them. And if you can understand it.. Then it can be quite hilarious. I haven't spoken to her in some time. Shuuhei keeps in touch with her more. Though I hear the younger Kyro twin is beginning to step out more with her singing. I hope she likes the demo tape I sent her. I've heard her. She's got her own sound and I think she will do well.

We walk the sidewalks. He leads me along and I nearly smile at how well he is doing. I've been trying so hard to train my senses to expand to be able to see object. But.. Its taking alot of work. Finally we make it and I approach the front. I pause at the door and I freeze as I focus and an outline appears in my mind and with a shaking hand I rest it on the handle of the door. "I... I got a picture in my mind.." I whisper in surprise. I follow his signature and smile for the first time in ages. "I can see an outline... I never thought..." I trail off and look back at the handle and open the door, smile remaining. I'm getting better with my power.

-2641

Blind Sight trained to Trained

Don't Help Me

I was shocked when Sousoke opened the door without help. He didn’t have to feel around for the knob or need my assistance with holding he, just reached out and grabbed it as any other person would and headed inside. In amazement I followed him in. but I saw was far different from what was viewing. Flames engulfed the room in a brilliant orange, and the heat from the fire rippled through the air and distorted my vision. Shock electrified through my frame as I passed a moment in pure terror. My heart pounded and covered my face to avoid the smoke and beat a hasty retreat back out the door when I notice Sousuke still continuing forward into he flames unharmed. I lowered the collar of my shirt and took a second look, the flames were still there but absent of the smoke that normally accompanied a fire. Also nothing was actually burning, sure the furniture and walls were ablaze but there was no sign of charring or ash. I cursed my mind inwardly, another hallucination? My natural instinct was to run and avoid the flames, but these flames weren’t really so I pushed through them and as I came into contact with them they disappeared.

Wc: 2,883

Its an amazing thing for me. I feel happier than I have in ages. it seems like my training is paying off. I walk in and wait for... You know. I never did get his name. That's a bit rude, even for me. I pause and turn to where I sense him. I frown as I sense him freeze. Something was wrong. I curse my blindness for a moment. Not being able to see the facial expression of people is something I wish I could see. I wonder what it would be like if I suddenly could see again. How blind would I become to my other senses. I wait for him and he finally enters. I step up close to him and gently touch his shoulder if he will not pull away.

"Are you all right?" I ask softly. "I sensed you pausing.." I add. I then sigh softly. "I've been a bit rude. I'm Kougatsu Sousuke. Call me Sou if you like. I was so caught up in escaping I forgot introductions," I say and smile abit, amused I forgot such a simple thing.

-2827

Sousuke sent to uyb