Mom really lost it after our dad died. She hadn’t worked since Jasper was born and she had no idea how to move on and make life work without him. She couldn’t look at Lexi or even say her name. Those things were there because of my little sister so what they did was somehow her fault. At first I didn’t agree with that line of thinking, but the more time I spent with my mother, the more sense it came to make. If Lexi hadn’t been born our dad would still be alive and we would still be happy. Jasper never really agreed with mom or me, but he was too easy going to speak up and tell us so. Mom gave Lexi up a little while later, we all went to take her to the orphanage. For once Jasper wasn’t smiling as mom drove us a long way from home. Lexi looked sad when we drove away, but mom was happy enough to smile so Jazz and I smiled with her as we waved goodbye to our little sister. That was the last time I saw Lexi. Not too long after that mom was taken to the hospital, her doctor said she would never come home, he said her mind was broken. Like we didn’t already know that. Jasper and I were sent to group home for kids, we were already too old to be considered for adoption so we lived in dormitory settings with other kids our age. Even though we were separated because girls and boys couldn’t sleep in the same room, we were at least housed in the same building. The people who ran the home were nice enough, no one was really nice, like motherly nice, but they didn’t hurt us or even yell at us too much. Pretty much we were allowed to do our own thing as long as we didn’t cause trouble. We would be kept there until our seventeenth birthdays and were told that we would do well to find some sort of job to save money before we were released. Jasper got a job first, I don’t know what he was doing but he made pretty good money for a kid. When I was old enough to work Jasper took me to a man he’d met through his own job. He was a big sweaty guy but he seemed nice enough and he told me I could work for him for cash, no taxes was always a plus for a kid like me. He owned what he called an ‘entertainment eatery’. It was a place where people could come to eat, drink, and catch some entertainment. Some nights he would have a live band, others were for karaoke, comedy routines, poetry readings, and amateur nights for those locals who were trying to be seen by important people. My job wouldn’t be as glamorous as being on stage, basically I would be making my way around the room collecting empty glasses and dishes so the waitresses wouldn’t have to worry about it. Legally I couldn’t serve the drinks, I was underage and the boss would be fined if Johnny law caught me serving, but it was a steady job and the money was decent. By the time Jasper left I had been working at the club for almost a year. Ric, the owner, agreed to keep an eye on me for the next two years while Jazz and I would be separated. Jasper promised that he’d try to come by work every so often to see me. He was going to continue the job he’d been doing, though I still didn’t know what it was, even at fifteen I was too young to know. He’d also promised to find a place for both of us so I would have somewhere to go when I came of age. I trusted my brother to do right by me, but not knowing what he was involved in, I also knew I needed a backup plan. A few months before by seventeenth birthday, Jasper came into the club for a long overdue visit. He told me that he had an apartment and his job was going smoothly, then he handed me the address and said he had to go. The place was close enough to the club that I could continue working for Ric, which we’d both been afraid would not be so. I felt a little better now that I knew I had a roof over my head when I was kicked out of the home, even better because I would be able to keep my current job, maybe even move up to a real waitress position someday. Still there was a nagging feeling that I needed to have the back up plan. I had come to suspect, mainly based on what Ric had told me about my brother, that Jasper’s work was of the criminal variety. That meant that I may be moving to an unsavory lifestyle. Which also meant that I would need to protect myself. Seeing as how Ric had become my surrogate father, I chose to talk to him about my fears one night after we had closed up the club. He understood my trepidation and felt that it was warranted. Then he offered to help me out with my plan. He agreed to provide me with some protection and teach me how to use it properly. The cost would be taken from my pay for the next few months. I was thrilled with the arrangement, I had enough money saved up already to take care of myself for quite a while so his docking my pay wouldn’t hurt me any and I knew that I would benefit from everything he could teach me. A week or so later, Ric presented me with a handgun he’d gotten a deal on. A deal in that world generally meant that the item had been appropriated by possibly illegal means, but if it meant less money being taken from my cut I didn’t care. Ric kept me after closing for an hour every night to teach me how to aim, fire, and carry the gun. Every night he would lock it up in the wall safe of his office before giving me a ride back to the home. The day I was released I went to the club to report for work like any other day, but at closing that night the gun wasn’t locked up. Ric handed it over and offered me a ride to my new home. Since I didn’t know what I was getting myself into, I accepted his offer. Jasper was there to meet us when we drove up, he’d cleaned up the place and had decorated my room in a way he knew I’d like. Ric was glad to see that we weren’t living in the worst part of town, that our apartment was actually quite decent, then he said his goodbyes and told me he’d see me at work the next day.
1176 words, Hakaisha
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